Lesson Objectives: It’s understood that society is the extended family. Everything we learn at home will be applied in society or elsewhere.

         It’s in the family that we consolidate the fundamental principles for a good relationship, whether within the family, society, everywhere. The family is the foundation, the basis for building a better world; but for this everyone should be susceptible to personal reconstruction.

         The idea is to get everybody involved to self-analyse themselves in this class, helping everyone to renew their attitudes and polish their virtues.

         The spiritist teacher can also do a search with some people to know what human imperfections most trouble these people in their relationships. Those imperfections that were not mentioned in this class could be used in future classes.

         Greetings and Opening Prayer

         First: start the lesson by saying: ‘Today our class will be very DELICIOUS. Let's start it, savouring different types of candy. I want to hear from each of you what you think about the flavours you experimented, because we’ll talk about it during classes.

         Explain the group dynamics: "Double Wish." The spiritist teacher should bring to class a box with various types of chocolates. They should have different sizes, quality and flavour. Please note each type should have three equal chocolates to it.

         Show this box to the adolescents. Ask them to organize themselves into pairs. The spiritist teacher should say the pairs need to give to their partner the chocolate the other chooses. The one who chooses the chocolate first will get the three chocolates (of the same type) from the box and hand over two of these to the other colleague.

         Before they start to choose their chocolates, ask the pairs to get organized in line. The spiritist teacher should not interfere in the way the queue is organised (only if necessary). If needed, the spiritist teacher should say they need to reach an agreement; otherwise the class will start without this activity.

         The spiritist teacher could also use the following phrase as a resource: "The last shall be first." The pair that takes too long to make the choice must go to the end of the queue.

         The spiritist teacher must be aware of their attitudes to comment on them further. Some of the topics (third stage of this lesson) we'll talk about may be presented at this time.

         Second: reflect of the attitudes presented by the adolescents during the group dynamics, concluding: To desire what another person has is bad, but it’s worse to wish the other person not to have what he/she has the right to. The best way is to focus on your goal. We can make a conscious decision to establish a goal and pursue it, until we are able to achieve it by striving unceasingly and without harming anyone.

         But it’s always good to highlight: material goods aren’t the most important things in our earthly journey. We might not deserve everything we wish to have; we might not even be prepared to have these things. Many of our material ambitions might not be the best option for us. To be happy with what we have requires effort.

         Third: talk about some issues that hinder a good relationship with our neighbour.

         If we look at human beings, we see a universe in place, a microcosm. Each organ in our body functions autonomously from the other, but inter-dependent. If for any reason our body is harmed, it will also affect the other organs; the functioning of the whole. Even though our immune system will try to solve the problem, if not strong enough, little by little the whole body system of the individual will succumb.

         The same process can be seen where man belongs - in the human society. We are active agents of our own life quality and the life quality of others; hence we can impact human relations. What we’ll learn in this moment maybe isn’t much, compared with the different issues that are not included here. But if each one self-evaluates and changes some of our wrong attitudes by understanding some of our imperfections, surely we’ll be contributing to build a more harmonious and happy society. Attention and efforts must be redoubled for a better absorption and application of these teachings. Our daily attitudes will demonstrate that.

         Get the adolescents to pick a number from 1 to 10. The adolescent who picked number 1 will get his/her topic and explain it to the rest of the group and so on until all topics have been discussed. The spiritist teacher should add his/her comments to each question after each explanation.

         Click here for suggested topics.

         Fourth: give pencil and paper to each adolescent for them to write down: What bothers them most in people? What characteristics they most enjoy in others? What attitudes they think others don’t like in them? Say they don’t need to write down their names down on their papers.

         Click here to see suggested questions that should be asked to the adolescents at this point.

         Fifth: analyse, discussing the following topics:

         ◙ We can only recognise what we know; that is, what already exists in us. So, when we get irritated due to certain people’s attitudes, we are recognizing in them our own attitudes; hence, the importance of self-knowledge. From every angle that we observe, for our eyes to be trusted, we need to know who we are, because it’s only then we can improve ourselves.

         ◙ We must ‘know ourselves’ before anything. If we don’t know ourselves, how can we progress? How can we change? For us to change, we need to know where we are and where we are going. It makes all the difference to go along in tune with our sense of life! Our suggestion is to rebuild; change from within. We must be aware that for everything to be built, a ‘base’ must be constructed; a sturdy and consistent foundation, as every construction requires a good foundation. What is the appropriate material for this base?

         ◙ The good Spirits always show willingness to help, but we need to offer them a base: disposition, perseverance, effort... Many of us are hoping to be rescued, but don’t want to make the efforts to change; people want the spirits to intrude on their lives and solve their problems... Jesus Christ, when he came to earth, taught the way we need to tread ourselves. The work of inner reform can’t be transferred to anyone else.

         ◙ We demand a lot from people and very little from us, but let’s remember: “No one can give what he/she doesn’t have”.

         ◙ Jesus didn’t even have a pillow to rest his head in times of fatigue during his time on Earth, but had all the treasures of the soul. He only had virtues inside of him; therefore he managed to see the good in people.

         ◙ Our eyes are selective; we focus on what we want to see only. Choose, then, to focus on the bright side, the more beautiful moments, the more vibrant things, the people, as a sunflower that’s always facing the sun! Our attitude should be to try to be an antenna that, at best, gets the good side of life; of people. We have an antenna in nature that does this: the sunflower. The sunflower turns to where the sun is; even when the sun is hidden behind a cloud. We have to learn to emphasize the good things we receive, but also acknowledge and learn from what we get that’s bad.

         ◙ The greatest challenge humanity faces is to know how to live with the differences of our neighbours, whether in taste, belief, point of view... It’s important to respect each one’s individuality, understanding that every being is in a step in the evolutionary scale.

         ◙ The best relationship is the one where each person learns to live along the faults of others and can admire their qualities.

         ◙ The world gives us in return everything we invest on it; so let's pay attention to our attitudes. If some people don’t act positively, don’t let these people’s attitudes determine yours. Always persevere in good deeds!

         ◙ We attract the help of the good spirits by helping our neighbours; helping them in their needs. Merits are benefits which accrue over time. They are the fruits of well-intentioned behaviour. When we modify our attitudes for the better, we gain merit since we are overcoming our weaknesses.

         ◙ Everyone longs for peace; for a just society... But what are we contributing for peace and justice to take place? Think about it!

         Sixth – theatre play: Renewing Attitudes.

         Seventh: re-write the appropriate attitudes of the characters from the theatre play Renewing Attitudess, giving opportunity for other adolescents to present it this time.

         Obs.: other pieces could be written, focusing on the renewal of attitudes in other daily situations.

         Click here to see suggested questions to be used at the end of the theatre play.

         Closing Prayer

         Suggested Class suitable for: 3rd cycle (11 to 12 years old) and Youth I (13 to 14 years old).

         Lesson received from Sandra Ramos Medeiros from Spiritist Centre ‘Fé, Amor e Caridade’.

         Translation: Carolina von Scharten, London, linked to BUSS - The British Union of Spiritist Societies.